At this point we may all know Chad Johnson/Ochocinco more as a brand rather than a football player. Take note Gronk, while athletes with undeniable skills dominate on the field, if their focus shifts too much from team player to playa, it could end in lost respect…and a job.
When Chad was just getting started as a Bengal, he established himself as a joker, but also as one of the best receivers in the league. However, with his ongoing antics, his own reality show, and a decline in his abilities on the field, he was eventually let go to New England where he had an underwhelming season, to say the least, bringing him to his very temporary home as a Dolphin. I really thought things were looking up for Chad in Miami; just the other week he was beaming on HBO’s new season of Hard Knocks. While there was no denying he was acting like himself, dropping 7 F-bombs in one conference, and having a “talk” with head coach Joe Philbin about the image he would be portraying, he seemed pumped to bring his A game to Miami and be given another shot at proving his career’s not over.
And then there’s his personal life. In Chad’s world nothing says commitment like dropping the “Ochocinco” and re-committing to Johnson, which he did for his new wife. So, I really did think things were looking up for Chad…until this weekend. Chad, say it ain’t so! Head-butting domestic violence charges?? Losing your spot as a happy Dolphin, man oh man. What’s next for Chad?
Football, that is. Happy first day of training camp! Not Gronk, he never left! Man, he was all over the place this off-season, never skipping a party rocking, fist pumping beat. Reality TV dating on The Choice (where I have total faith he was looking for a real, long lasting love as can be found on The Bachelorette), partying (sans shirt, of course), charity appearances (he strutted his stuff at a charity football game for Best Buddies in Boston that I attended and Tom Brady was unfashionably late for), magazine covers (see picture below), you name it, he did it in the off-season and I’m pretty sure we couldn’t get rid of him if we tried…not that I want to, look at those abs! Can you say Magic Mike worthy? Gronk, call me maybe…
It wasn’t just the summer of Gronk shenanigans, it was the off-season where the Patriots ditched my beloved Ochocinco. Though he certainly did not deliver last season, leaving my affections for him lackluster, as you know, here at Fumbling Forward, I have a soft spot for the man whose love of himself is unparalleled, and it cracks me up. Chad, congrats on your nuptials and your new name change back to Johnson. Soo now that you finagled a #85 jersey in Miami, are you going to keep it? How long will this last? Either way, wishing you luck in Miami as long as that doesn’t entail you bringing it in full force like you failed to do for the Pats, that would really break my Ocho-loving heart. P.s. loving you on Instagram, Chad, always modeling new suits and kicks, looking fresh.
Also, Brady is having another super human sure to be beautiful baby with Gisele. As you can see, it was a busy off-season.
But now let’s get down to football.
So, we shall see, but I have faith in the Patriot way and am oh so excited for my football Sundays to rear their lovely head again! Get out the beers and cheers to the beginning of my 2.5 season as a full-fledged football lover!
Hello Fumbling Forward followers!
Until football returns in full force, I will be on a break from blogging as well. See you all in the fall!
"Is it better to make it to the Super Bowl and suffer the ultimate crushing defeat, or to have never made it at all?" "Why am I so upset right now?" "Jenna, you’re on vacation, buck up, this is not the end of the world, it’s just a game." "Where is the exit…where the hell is the exit?! I have to get out of this bar ASAP!" "Is that Giants fan following me and mocking me? Seriously, man get away from me." "Where is the closest frozen yogurt shop?"
These were some of the thoughts going through my head in the moments following the Patriots’ crushing defeat.
Everyone deals with grief differently and by the 4th quarter my cell phone had been turned off as a safety precaution. Nervous eating ensued. By the end of the game I was briskly walking out of that bar, away from the TVs with their mocking stream of confetti, away from Eli’s smiling mug, and high tailing it to the closest frozen yogurt shop to soothe my soul with my favorite low cal treat (surprise surprise). My next impulse reaction: “if I’m not going to be happy, I’m going to make other people happy.” I started giving money out to the homeless. It helped a little.
The attached article was sent to me by a friend, and out of all the articles I have read in the past few days, it captures my thoughts and emotions most accurately. Author Bill Simmons has helped me cope with the Patriots loss by showing me I am not alone in my grief, way of handling my grief, and thought processes following loss, and also by pointing out 15 “silver linings” from Super Bowl 46.
First off, he confronts the haunting question, “why does this matter to me so much?” I struggled with this question Sunday night. I’m healthy. My family is healthy (and Giants fans, boo). I have wonderful friends and a fantastic boyfriend. Clearly in the grand scheme of things, losing a sporting event is not the worst thing in the world. I felt insane. I couldn’t bear to turn on my phone and see pity texts, mocking texts, Facebook victory statuses, I was crushed. “There’s no feeling quite like watching your team blowing a big game. It’s devastating. It’s paralyzing. It’s the only feeling that a 6-year-old, a 42-year-old and a 64-year-old can share exactly.” Sure, I was hurting, but how special and unique is it that all sports fans, young, old, male, female, everyone feels exactly the same; it’s just another reason to love the game.
I do truly believe that in light of every bad experience, every loss, there is a silver lining. Even if you can’t spot it at first, in time, it becomes clear. Though my feelings of sadness overwhelmed me, they were also feelings of connectivity in sorrow to an entire fandom, which is weirdly comforting, and in itself a silver lining.
That Sunday morning, Simmons went to the Hoosiers gym in Indiana and also talked his way out of a speeding ticket. As a result, Simmons found a silver lining in Sunday not only being the day that the Patriots lost the Super Bowl. Whenever I think back to Super Bowl 46, I will remember that it wasn’t just the weekend the Patriots lost the Super Bowl, but also the weekend I spent in San Francisco wine touring, eating five course French meals, and enjoying 65 degree weather in February. Certainly a silver lining.
Simmons and I also both share in the very odd joy that the Super Bowl was followed by a “To Catch a Predator” marathon. Disturbing, yes. Unintentionally hilarious, yes. Watching Chris Hansen nail those sick SOBs by tempting them with sweet tea and fake internet personas helped ease my pain.
"Sweet Caroline" made a timely appearance on the cab’s radio as I was headed home. Boston, Patriots, I love you no matter what. I’m a newbie, it was the first time that I cared about a team in the Super Bowl and I know it won’t be the last. Super Bowl 47, watch out.
Take note, Ladies and Gentleman. However, a few points I find fault with:
1) I would encourage you to mimic touchdown celebrations. Maybe even invent your own and get down wit yo bad self.
2) Hey, I don’t think this year’s Super Bowl would be legit without at least one Tebow.
3) If you feel inspired to play the banjo whilst wearing a speedo…I say go with your instincts.
Have a super Super Bowl, everyone! GO PATRIOTS!!!
Preparing for a Super Bowl party is easy when it comes to food. Everyone will be totally satisfied with some monster sandwiches, chips and dips, and beer…lots of beer. But, As you’ve seen from pictures of mine, I like themed food, it’s way cuter and even if your not going for the “cute” vibe because it cramps your manly style, the women at your Super Bowl party will go gaga for it, and you’ll be applauded for your creativity. So, in order to feed your creative football fan foodie side, I present to you a lovely list of game time snack ideas. Enjoy!